Coping with Stress : A Parent’s Guide
It is normal for parents to feel stressed at times. However if stress occurs too often it can be hard for parents to deal with their children’s behaviour.
What causes stress?
Being a parent is challenging particularly having to juggle too many demands of everyday life. Stress can also come from placing high expectations on yourself and it can be caused by how you think about things.
How does stress affect parenting?
• Less likely to be calm and consistent
• Low energy levels and concentration
• Irritable and impatient
• Provide less supervision
• More likely to criticise your child
• Less likely to praise and reward good behaviour
How to recognise stress?
Signs of Stress
• Tense or stiff muscles
• Headaches
• Irritability or anger
• Disturbed sleep
• Tiredness
• Problems concentrating
• Stomach aches
• Skin reactions
• Repeated infections or viruses
How to reduce stress
• Consider some lifestyle changes
• Decrease workload
• Share responsibility for chores and childcare
• Say “no” if people ask you to do too much
• Get support from friends and family
• Seek help if child’s behaviour concerns you
• Maintain a healthy lifestyle
• Try to make time each day for at least one thing you enjoy doing by yourself
How to manage daily stress
Notice tension
• Identify where your body gets tense
• As soon as you notice tension do something about it
Learn to relax
• Deep breathing
• Muscle relaxation (feel the build-up of tension, hold for 10 seconds, notice where it is particularly tense, release the tension slowly, Identify muscles that are relaxing, notice how it feels, relax for 20 seconds).
• Imagination
• Meditation
• Warm bath
• Listen to relaxing music
Catch unhelpful thoughts
• Negative thoughts about self or a situation “I can’t cope with this”.
• Try to catch thoughts that make you feel more stressed or upset.
• Write down your feelings and try to remember the thoughts that made you feel that way.
Develop some coping statements
• These can help you calm down
• Think of helpful things to say to yourself in stressful situations
• “I can do it” “stay calm”
• It can be useful to prepare for situations when you think your child might misbehave.
Challenge unhelpful thoughts
• Try to reach a more realistic or helpful way of thinking about the same situation
• With practice you can begin to challenge negative self-talk quickly and easily
Develop a coping plan
What you could do and think to prepare yourself
• As you enter the situation
• To stay calm during the situation
• To congratulate yourself afterwards
